Office by Alex Penny
Absolutely random stuff
its being done BY a farm animal to the face of a loud mouth undesirable like, say Newt Gingrich or Ted Nugent…
I teach you how to do this karate move in my book “How To Beat Up Anybody”.
Notice the perfect technique. This move requires intense concentration. Warning for Women: Staring at this for more than 2 seconds can cause instant orgasm & and in many cases…pregnancy.
Learn more about karate from…
dvdp:
120115
‘Spare time’…what exactly is that anyway? Well I guess I kind of know, but do I really? I mean, I relax, sleep, go hang out with friends, exercise, and do stuff in general, but is that really spare time? Time is probably one of the most constant of constants in our daily lives. 24hrs in a day, never fails, set your clock back or forward and 24hrs are yours to do what you want.
I guess it’s just me feeling the pressure of being judged by others or myself, even. I mean really. I only feel like I should be doing something with my time after work or on the weekends instead of relaxing because you hear all the “In my spare time I enjoying putting diapers on zoo monkeys/ making cupcakes for party clowns/ I’m in a book club or something crazy like that and then I get all “WWGCD” (What Would George Clooney Do)—at myself when watching a beautiful Saturday or Sunday afternoon creep by without moving a muscle. Then I’d move right on to, “Maaan, I ain’t Clooney. It’s wine:30.” Although, deep down I would be feeling a twinge of guilt for not moving off the couch, chair, floor, bed, etc, like I’m supposed to be doing something special with my spare time. But what exactly is spare about time? Does it really exist?
“I could have sooo been up there instead that show-off…I put my speedos on one leg at a time, just like him.”—Guy in the back corner of the room—
(Source: bcgold)
All this does is make me want Jack in the Box.
KYMdb - Alternate Universe
(Source: unmerica)
(via jack-douglass)
The jigs up…
(Source: thatfunnything)
